My sisters, mom, Grandma, and I just saw "Hollywood's chick flix take on DV" (aka the movie "Waitress" with Keri Russell)... Very different from Julia Roberts' "Sleeping With The Enemy" from way back when... And thankfully, nowhere near as scary - I can't handle scary movies!!

Anyway, call me a cornball, but I so wanted the Waitress movie's ending to be Marijke's happy ending - it seems like in September/October, Marijke was ALMOST there, too!!

If only, DV were as easy to escape and identify as it was in that movie...

Interestingly enough, its female director (Adrienne Shelly) was murdered a few days after she completed "Waitress"!! According to what I read, a construction worker murdered her after she complained he was making noise in the apartment below hers.

The director's death sure reminds me that violence really IS everywhere!! If someone wants to kill, they sure don't seem to need much of a motive these days!!

I always seem to come back to children. I know that with my children, what I aim for every day is that they believe in themselves. And, my goodness, do they ever! Whenever I tell my son that he's so smart, he says "yeah I know." And my daughter is by far the spunkiest girl I've run into... except for her cousins Sophie, Julia (!!!), & Harper & Quinn. As Sandy, Sophie's mother, says, those girls could take over the world together!

I loved this story that Natalie told me about H & Q the other day. She said that Quinn was trying on her lipstick, and turned to Harper & asked her what she thought. Harper said: "That looks stupid." Quinn said: "No. I'm beautiful." Natalie & I both want so much for the twins, and my kids, and all other kids out there, to be so strong in themselves that someone else's opinion has no ability to blow them down, and also that they will never know the desperation that comes with wanting to kill oneself, like Sean did.

I hope so much that all children can know that they are loved and that they are needed on this planet.

Last Edited on 15-Jan-2008 12:12 PM

Each child out there has such a unique little personality. If you haven't picked up on it yet through my many postings & Jheremy's exclamation points, my eldest (Julia's) personality is CERTAINLY immediately apparent to all that meet her!! :) Although her strong will can make parenting a challenge and I certainly have learned to pick my battles, she speaks her mind whenever she desires (and often to whomever she desires in whichever tone she desires). Like I said, I pick my battles. I admire her confidence. And I love the fact that when we discuss right vs. wrong & people that need our help & issues involving her safety and the safety of those around her, she is so steadfast and such a wise "old soul". Her talents at her age amaze me. I also admire that like little Quinn, she DOES feel beautiful. Which I think is so important for people... I definitely did NOT feel beautiful at her age. I was scrawny with glasses and thanks to my big sister informing me of it, considered myself quite the nerdy, "wierd" little girl!! (For the record, my sister is much nicer to me now and I don't consider myself as nerdy or wierd, but I'll always be that little girl inside ~) :)

I think it's important for us to realize that whether we have 1 child or 10 children, the responsibility to each one is the same... To truly know them, love them how they need to be loved, and raise them to go out into this world and love others. There is no "mold" that children should be forced into. Each one is completely unique. Whatever parenting works for one most likely won't work for the next. In fact, it amazes me that my husband and I can have 3 children with the same source of genes but such a different blend in each one - God does have a sense of humor, doesn't he??!! :)

Sometimes, I think it would be so wonderful if there was a manual we received in the hospital immediately after giving birth or adopting a child that we could use as parents... It would be 1,000s of pages and would have a section for each issue, or each stage in development. And we could flip to that section and know EXACTLY what our child needs.

Alas, although there are countless books out there (many I have read), I have yet to find that manual that seems to know MY children... Most days, I really feel like I'm in the middle of a science experiment, only I was never that great at science and I feel like many of my experiments are failing... I will see these super-moms all over the place and think, "Wow, they've got it all figured out, must be nice!!" Of course, in my mind, just b/c your kids are well-dressed and getting A's on their report card and your house is clean does NOT mean you have it all figured out!! :)

So I try to not be too hard on myself and compare myself to other moms because I figure that if I can honestly say that I am giving this motherhood thing everything that I have, then, how can I fail my children?

What scares me a little is I think there are many parents out there that for whatever reason, may find themselves on "auto-pilot" (i.e. "I'm raising my kids how my parents raised me regardless of the fact that my kid might be nothing like me") mode... And please know that I'm not trying to point any fingers and everyone has their own cross to bear, but - - it's situations like these that scare the heck out of me!!!

Maybe that's where we all have to step back in... regardless of if we even have children...

When we see these kids (& then adults) literally screaming for help (not physically screaming, but you know what I mean), I think we need to pay attention to those screams and do what we can. We may not be able fix or know what is going on in their homes behind closed doors, but we should still have our eyes open and help when we can (while keeping ourselves safe). If a child is not receiving love (or the right kind of love) at home, I can only imagine how much our words would mean if the child knows that someone else does love and understand them for who they really are... I see examples all the time of children that we're "saved" from their own home emotionally by a friend's mom, a teacher, or some other adult in their life.

Basically, I think we're all in this thing together and these little people running around everywhere ARE our future. We have more power than we can imagine to help them reach adulthood in a happy and loved state.

Every moment matters. If you ask me, it's never too late to love someone the way they need to be loved...

**If that person is now gone from earth and an opportunity was tragically missed (as often occurs in our world), then by all means, start loving others that are STILL HERE and loving them in INTENTIONAL (i.e. non-auto pilot) ways - LOVE & CELEBRATE THEM FOR WHO THEY ARE NOT WHO YOU THINK THEY SHOULD BE!!**